Thursday, July 16, 2009

Garage Door

Garage Door.... Joke of the day..........

The boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was
down and his fly area wide open. His assistant walked up to him and
said, 'This morning when you left your house, did you close your
garage door?' The boss told her he knew he'd closed the garage door,
and walked into his office puzzled by the question.

As he finished his paperwork, he suddenly noticed his fly was open,
and zipped it up. He then understood his assistant's question about
his 'garage door.'

He headed out for a cup of coffee and paused by her desk to ask, 'When
my garage door was open, did you see my H ummer parked in there?'

She smiled and said, 'No, I didn't. All I saw was an old mini van with
two flat tires..

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Be Positive Like This Boy

Be Positive Like This Boy

A beautiful Madam was having trouble with one of her students in 1st Grade class. Madam asked,'Boy. what is your problem?'

Boy answered, 'I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 4th Grade!'

Madam had enough. She took the Boy to the principal's office. While the Boy waited in the outer office, madam explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Madam he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his
questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.She agreed.

the Boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'
Boy.: '9'.

Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?'
Boy.: '36'.

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 4th grade should know. The principal looks at Madam and tells her, 'I think Boy can go to the 4th grade.'

Madam says to the principal, 'I have some of my own questions.

Can I ask him ?' The principal and Boy both agreed.

Madam asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of'?

Boy, after a moment 'Legs.'

Madam: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'

Boy.: 'Pockets.'

Madam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Boy.: Coconut

Madam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft And sticky?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Boy was taking charge.

Boy.: Bubblegum

Madam: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer..

Boy.: Shake hands

Madam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.

Boy.: Tent

Madam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.

Boy.: Wedding Ring

Madam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.

Boy.: Nose

Madam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Boy.: Arrow

Madam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement?

Boy.: Fire truck

Madam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u don't get it, u have to use ur hand.

Boy.: Fork

Madam: What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?


Madam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making love ?

Boy.: HEART.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,

'Send this Boy to
IIM AHMEDABAD (Indian Institute Of Managment)
I got the last ten questions wrong myself!'

Thursday, June 4, 2009


Lateral Thinking Abilities

--- Think!

1. There is a man who lives on the top floor of a very tall building. Everyday he gets the elevator down to the ground floor to leave the building to go to work. Upon returning from work though, he can only travel half way up in the lift and has to walk the rest of the way unless it's raining! Why?

(This is probably the best known and most celebrated of all lateral thinking puzzles. It is a true classic. Although there are many possible solutions which fit the initial conditions, only the canonical answer is truly satisfying.)


2. A man and his son are in a car accident. The father dies on the scene, but the child is rushed to the hospital. When he arrives the surgeon says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son! ?How can this


3. A man is wearing black. Black shoes, socks,trousers, lumper, gloves and balaclava. He is walking down a black street with all the street lamps off. A black car is coming towards him with its light off but somehow manages to stop in time. How did the driver see the man?


4. Why is it better to have round manhole covers than square ones?

This is logical rather than lateral, but it is a good puzzle that can be solved by lateral thinking techniques. It is supposedly used by a very well-known software company as an interview question for prospective employees.


5. A man went to a party and drank some of the punch. He then left early. Everyone else at the party who drank the punch subsequently died of poisoning. Why did the man not die?


6. A man walks into a bar and asks the barman for a glass of water. The barman pulls out a gun and points it at the man. The man says 'Thank you' and walks out.

This puzzle claims to be the best of the genre. It is simple in its! statement, absolutely baffling and yet with a completely satisfying solution. Most people struggle very hard to solve this one yet they like the answer when they hear it or have the satisfaction of figuring it out.

1. The man is very, very short and can only reach halfway up the elevator buttons. However,if it is raining then he will have his umbrella with him and can press the higher buttons with it.

2. The surgeon was his mother.

3. It was day time.

4. A square manhole cover can be turned and dropped down the diagonal of the manhole. A round manhole cannot be dropped down the manhole. So for safety and practicality, all manhole covers should be round.

5. The poison in the punch came from the ice cubes. When the man Drank the punch, the ice was fully frozen. Gradually it melted, poisoning the punch.

6. The man had hiccups. The barman recognized this from his speech and drew the gun in order to give him a shock. It worked and cured the hiccups-so the man no longer needed the water.


Monday, May 25, 2009

Coffee Art -2

Here Comes part 2 of the coffee art, do check out part 1 here.

For all coffee lovers....

Monday, May 18, 2009


100 years ago,
they said that when a black man became president,
pigs would fly.

and on the 100th day of Obama's presidency ...

Swine Flew

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Newton's Law of Love

Universal law:
Love can neither be created nor be destroyed, only it can transfer from one girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money.

First law:
A boy in love with a girl, continues to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continues to be in love with him, until on unless any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and breaks the legs of the boy.

Second law:
The rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance.

Third law:
The force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while using her sandals.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Coffee art-1

Today moring on CNA prime time morning ,when i saw two coffee experts talking, and viewing how artistically ,what they did with the cream , coffee, milk and imagination, remembered i had these nice snaps(their art) in my drafts. So thought of publishing them today..

Have a look, these pictures are from a restaurant in Vancouver (actually three) where they dress up the lattes.

For all coffee lovers,
PS: More pictures coming on the way

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Coffee and Cup

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups.

Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Some times, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

Don't let the cups drive you... Enjoy the coffee instead.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

See you tomorrow

An old man approached the White House from Across Pennsylvania Avenue, where he'd been
sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the U.S. Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to goin and meet with President Bush.

The Marine looked at the man and said, "Sir, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides here."

The old man said, "Okay", and walked away.

The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the same
Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides

The man thanked him and, again, just walked away.

The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same U.S. Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."
The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said,
"Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking
to speak to Mr. Bush. I've told you already that Mr. Bush is no
longer the president and no longer resides here. Don't you

The old man looked at the Marine and said,
"Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it."

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you
tomorrow, Sir."

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Strange Ads

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Party Puzzle (Old advertisements)

Answers at the end..

Question 1
Which brand used this jingle - 'Suno Suno ai Babuji...kahan chale?'

1. Nirma Washing Powder
2. Fena Washing Powder
3. Doctor Washing Powder
4. Ghadi Detergent Cake

Question 2
Which brand used he jingle 'Ab main bilkul boodha hoon ...goli kha kar jeeta hoon'?
1. Dabur
2. Bajaj
3. Vicco
4. Crompton Greaves

Question 3
The TVC went 'Dadi maa, dadi maa woh madari ke pet mein dard hai' Identify the product.
1. Dabur ka Hajmola
2. Dabur ka Pudinhara
3. Dabur ka chyawanprash
4. Dabur ka Pachan Choorna

Question 4
'Dekho beta yeh toh kudrat ki baat hai' What was this one for?
1. Kribhco Khaad
2. Nasbandi Yojna
3. Nirodh
4. Vicco Vajradanti
5. Family Planning Dept.

Question 5
The line 'Pachaas Saal ke boodhe ya pachaas saal ke jawan' sold what?
1. Thirty Plus Energy Capsules
2. Shilajeet Yauvan Vardhak
3. Zandu Pacharisht
4. 555 Shaving Blades

Question 6
'Match ki aakhri gend, aur yeh laga sixer!' What was follow up?
1. Palmolive da Jawaab nahi!
2. Yeh Andar ki Baat hai!!
3. Thodi si pet pooja, kabhi bhi kahin bhi
4. Natraj phir champion!!

Question 7
'Aur phir bhediye ne memne se kaha...' which actor did this famous ad for Vicks?

1. Vivek Vaswani
2. Shafi Inamdar
3. Jayant Kriplani
4. Jalal Agha

Question 8
'Aap apni biwi se kitna pyaar karte hain?' was the opening line for which product?
1. Hawkins
2. Prestige
3. United

Question 9
'Pehle bhojan phir bhajan; Pehle mangni phir lagan 'What did this jingle sell?
1. Gagan Vanaspati
2. Pan Parag
3. Mala D
4. MDH Masala

Question 10
'Sach much kafi bada hai!'Kya kafi bada hai?
1. Parle G ka naya pack
2. Naya Colgate
3. Lifebuoy
4. OK sabun

Question 11
Which product's TVC did this line open - 'Kya hua? Bachhi ro rahi hai.'
1. Dabur Pudinhara
2. Woodward's Gripe Water
3. 555 Mughli Ghutti
4. Johnsons Baby Powder

Question 12
Paintal plays a Jester or Vidushak in mime for this product
1. Jenson & Nicholson
2. Gold Spot
3. Cherry Blossom
4. Vicco Ayurvedic

Question 13
The jingle 'Bade nazon se paali hamari banno' is selling....

1. Fair & Lovely Fairness Cream
2. Emami Cold Cream
3. Boroplus
4. Vicco Turmeric
5. Clearisil

Q1.-- 1
Q2.-- 2
Q3.-- 2
Q4.-- 5
Q5.-- 3
Q6.-- 4
Q7.-- 3
Q8.-- 2
Q9.-- 1
Q10.-- 4
Q11.-- 2
Q12.-- 3
Q13.-- 4

You can make many copies of this (ofcourse after removing the answers),and then distribute among all, and can set some time limit too(say 5 minutes)

Monday, January 19, 2009

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Drawing a Lady from inside out....quite amazing

Drawing a woman from the inside out; someone put a huge amount of work into this. Click on the link and be prepared to be amazed!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Praying For Ideal Husband/ Wife in New Year

Husband's prayers for an IDEAL Wife

Aisi apni wife ho,
5' 6" jiski height ho,
Jeans jiski tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 25 ho,
Aisi apni wife ho....

Sadak par sab kahe kitni khoobsurat ho,
Bheed mein sab kahe side ho, side ho,
Banjara hills, jubli hills ya kisi ameer ghar ki paidaish ho,
Saas ki seva jiski khwahish ho,
Aisi apni wife ho.....

Padosi jab baat kare to haath mein knife ho,
Dinner ke time candle light ho,
Hum mein tum mein kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milne ke baad dil delight ho,
ye shayeri padne ke baad log kahe "tum right ho",
Aisi apni wife ho.....

Kaash ye concept .0001 percent bhi right ho,
Agar aisi apni wife ho,
To kya haseen life ho...

Har kisi ki yahi farmaish ho,
Kudrat ki bhi aazmaish ho,
Khuda ke software mein bhi bug ki gunjaish ho,
Kahin to aisi paidaish ho,
Aisi apni wife ho..... !!!

Wife's prayers for an IDEAL Husband..

Aisa apna husband ho
6' - 6'2" jiski height ho
Jeans dheeli magar body tight ho
biwi ke har nakhre uthaye, itna mizaaj uska light ho
husband apna aisa bright ho.

uff tak na kare itna quiet ho
dinner banaye wo jab bhi romantic night ho
shopping kar ke jab bhi aoon, bole begum tum kitni nice ho
husband apna aisa bright ho.

mujhey rani bana kar rakhe, to phir zindagi delight ho
saas sasur ke samne kahe, jaan tum hamesha right ho
hamesha jo haar maan jaye jab bhi koi fight ho
husband apna aisa bright ho.

jahan chahoon jaoon, jo chahey karoon, kuch is tarah ki life ho
har doosre week ghoomne phirne ki flight ho
aisa ho jaye to mein udoon aasmaan mei, jaise ke koi kite ho
husband apna aisa bright ho !!!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

A lie Detector

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.

One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.

'Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?' asked John.

'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,' said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.

'Son,' said John, 'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school.' 'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.

'What did you watch?' asked Marsha. 'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy. The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair once more. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied.

We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'

'I am ashamed of you son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'

The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, 'Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!'

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

Sunday, January 4, 2009


Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble. Such nice anagrams..
(Wait till you see the last one)!

When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:



When you rearrange the letters:


Friday, January 2, 2009

Poem & Practical, Don't miss it (+ 18)

The sky was dark
the moon was high
all alone just her and I

Her hair so soft
her eyes so blue
I knew just what she wanted to do

Her skin so soft
her legs so fine
I ran my fingers down her spine

I didn't know how
but I tried my best
to place my hand on her breast

I remember my fear
my fast beating heart
but slowly she spread her legs apart

And when she did
I felt no shame
as all at once the white stuff came

At last it was finished
it's all over now,
my first time...

Milking a cow